Piano, Pageants & Politics

The Reality of Being a Musician Around the Holidays

1. People want to hear Christmas songs in October. You really don't want to play them and quite, honestly you haven't gone over them this year.

2. Thanksgiving means relearning 40 songs with weird chords that you can only play for three weeks. You've been putting it off long enough. You really don't want to. But you have to.

3. People get mad when you only play Christmas songs at gigs.

4. People get mad when you don't only play Christmas songs at gigs. You can't please everyone.

5. You can't go to any of your friends' Holiday parties; you're probably working.

6. If for some crazy reason you are able to make it to one of those parties, you will be expected to lead everyone in Christmas carols. Even though your voice is shot from singing the last 4 nights in a row.

7. Tips suddenly drastically decrease because people are trying to save up for the Holidays.

8. You realize you own about 50 piano/music note ornaments because it is the go-to gift of friends, students and family members.

9. The Hippopotamus song. Thank you, Amazon commercial. I now have to play that song every night. And it is nearly impossible to get out of your head.

10. There is constant anxiety about how much gigging will slow down in January.

11. When people request "Last Christmas", which according to most people, is by Taylor Swift.

12. You really don't like the snow. If it snows, your gig will get cancelled. And you will not get paid.

13. You become an expert on gear because every parent wants to know what keyboard, amp, music book and/or musical accessories they should get their kid for Christmas.

14. You have to transpose that Mariah Carey song. Every time.

15. You laugh when people complain about how Christmas music is overplayed. Not only do you inevitably hear it at the grocery store, the mall, the post office, etc, but you have to hear it in every piano lesson and then perform it 4 nights per week.

16. There is nothing worse than having to take down your equipment and pack up your car on a freezing cold night.

17. Office Christmas parties are filled with people drinking, that never go out. Inevitably, they get way too drunk and want to sing obnoxious songs on the mic with you.

18. The other half of office party-goers realize they have to see their coworkers/boss the next day and refuse to sing along or have any fun in fear of looking like exhibit #17.

19. Every musician knows that New Year's Eve is really the biggest night of the year.

20. You're bummed out that it falls on a Saturday this year because you'd probably be performing on a Saturday night anyways and NYE was just always a bonus night of work.

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